"Whatever you do, don't smile," I told Pop. She currently has braces on her teeth. "You look like a portcullis." I used the English word, because I don't know the Thai equivalent, if indeed there is one. Pop just looked bemused. But have you ever tried to stop a Thai smiling? Can't be done. I kept cracking up laughing, because she was giving me huge smiles without realising it, and that of course made her laugh. We stumbled through this session, believe me. Nice girl, really nice, comes from Nan province in the North.

.Captain Outrageous has been involved with the ladyboy scene in Thailand for over twenty years.His contacts go well beyond the bar workers and into the colleges, poputy salons, cabaret shows, poputy contests, and just about anywhere else that you find these gorgeous girls.

Many of the models are the Captain's personal friends